Why This Matters

This site doesn’t recommend facilitators or retreats. We can’t—we don’t know your situation, your needs, or the current state of any particular facilitator’s practice.

For the complete vetting process and deeper context, see our comprehensive guide to choosing a facilitator.

What we can do is give you the questions that experienced practitioners ask. The right facilitator will welcome these questions. The wrong one will be evasive, defensive, or dismissive.

Trust your instincts. If something feels off during this process, it probably is.

Before You Ask: What to Notice

Pay attention to how the facilitator responds to your inquiry:

• Response time: Days of silence followed by a hard sell is a flag
• Willingness to talk: A brief call before committing is reasonable
• Pressure tactics: “Spots filling fast” or urgency without substance
• Listening: Do they ask about you, or just talk about themselves?

The Questions

Training & Experience

• “What is your training background? Who did you learn from?”
• “How long have you been facilitating ceremonies?”
• “How many ceremonies have you facilitated?”
• “Do you have ongoing relationship with teachers or a lineage?”

What you’re listening for: Specificity. Real practitioners can tell you their story. Vagueness or deflection is a flag.

Red flag responses:

• “I was called by the medicine” (with no further training mentioned)
• Inability to name teachers or lineage
• Claims of being “self-taught” with plant medicines

Safety Protocols

• “What medical screening do you do before ceremony?”
• “What medications are contraindicated? How do you screen for them?”
• “What happens if someone has a medical emergency during ceremony?”
• “Do you have training in managing difficult psychological experiences?”
• “Is there someone sober present throughout the ceremony?”

What you’re listening for: Concrete protocols, not reassurances. They should be able to describe their screening process and emergency procedures.

Red flag responses:

• “The medicine knows what it’s doing”
• “We’ve never had any problems”
• Dismissing medication interactions as unimportant
• No sober support present

The Setting

• “How many people typically attend ceremony?”
• “What is the ratio of facilitators to participants?”
• “What does the physical space look like?”
• “What support is available during and after ceremony?”
• “Where do participants sleep? Are there private spaces available?”

What you’re listening for: A ratio no worse than 1:8 (facilitator to participant), private space availability, clear after-care.

Red flag responses:

• Large groups (20+) with minimal support
• Shared sleeping spaces with no privacy option
• No aftercare or integration support mentioned

Consent & Boundaries

• “What is your policy on physical touch during ceremony?”
• “How do you handle participants who are distressed?”
• “What are the boundaries around interactions between facilitators and participants?”
• “What happens if I need to leave or stop participating?”

What you’re listening for: Clear, explicit policies. Respect for your autonomy.

Red flag responses:

• Vague answers about touch (“we do what feels right”)
• “You can’t leave once you’ve started”
• Any romantic or sexual undertone whatsoever
• Emphasis on “surrender” that minimizes your agency

Integration Support

• “What integration support do you provide after ceremony?”
• “How long should I plan to stay after the ceremony?”
• “Do you offer follow-up calls or check-ins?”
• “What resources do you recommend for ongoing integration?”

What you’re listening for: Recognition that integration is crucial, not just an add-on.

Red flag responses:

• “The ceremony is the healing” (with no integration mentioned)
• Rushing participants out immediately after
• No follow-up offered or available

Practical & Legal

• “What is the total cost, including any additional fees?”
• “What is your cancellation policy?”
• “What is the legal status of this ceremony where it’s held?”
• “What happens if I have a difficult experience and need additional support afterward?”

What you’re listening for: Transparency about money and legal reality.

Red flag responses:

• Hidden fees revealed later
• No refund under any circumstances
• Dismissing legal concerns
• No accountability for adverse outcomes

The Hard Question

• “Can you tell me about a time when things went wrong in ceremony, and how you handled it?”

What you’re listening for: Honest acknowledgment that difficult things happen, and a clear description of how they responded.

Red flag responses:

• “Nothing has ever gone wrong”
• Defensiveness or refusal to discuss
• Blaming participants for their own difficult experiences

After the Conversation

Sit with what you learned. Ask yourself:

• Did I feel heard?
• Were my questions welcomed or deflected?
• Do I trust this person with my vulnerability?
• What is my gut telling me?

You don’t owe anyone your participation. If something feels off, honor that feeling. There will be other opportunities.

What This List Can’t Do

This list helps you ask the right questions. It cannot:

• Guarantee safety (no ceremony is risk-free)
• Replace your own discernment
• Account for things you don’t know to ask
• Predict how a facilitator will actually behave

The best predictor is how someone treats you before they have your money. Pay attention.

If Something Goes Wrong

If you experience harm in ceremony, it’s not your fault for “not asking the right questions.” Harm can happen even with experienced, well-intentioned facilitators.

If you need support:

• Crisis Resources - Immediate help
• Fireside Project - Psychedelic peer support
• MAPS Psychedelic Peer Support - For reporting concerns

You are not alone. What happened to you matters.